notabluesbro: (Mini! ○ Sitting and waiting)
Nicholas D. Wolfwood ([personal profile] notabluesbro) wrote2011-01-03 05:31 pm

13th Confession [Action/voice]

[Of course, Vash wasn't the only kid Legato ran into. The ass confused the hell out of him, but moreover, he wondered if he really was going to be 'trained' by someone. Trained to fight, right? And he said he'd be skillful, too... But right now? He called him useless. Incapable. Just some stray dog.

"If you think yourself capable, that is something you must prove."

Nicholas wanders into town and takes a seat at a bench, with journal in hand. Considers using it—even if it is confusing, and even if he's not the kind to spark up conversation. Instead he simmers a little, brow furrowed, reaching down and shaping snowballs before throwing them at the nearest building totally sorry if he doesn't see you coming around the corner or something. For some reason, he feels like he's done this before. Something about the whiteness of all this is familiar, but... ah, well. He's too busy trying to decipher what that blue haired guy told him.

He was worth something. Wasn't he? Or was what every said true...]


[Voice]

How do y'prove you're worth something...?

[After that, he decides to go back into the forest and try to talk with that Eferin guy. Things weren't as bad as last time; he even got to actually speak to him, without any running or cursing. Even if it meant sucking up to the bastard, just a little. He's in the forest, sitting on the gnarled roots of a tree, lighting and putting out the end of a thin twig. It takes all of his concentration, but it's worth it. His pants leg has a hole burned into it, but whatever burn mark was under it has been wrapped up by a ripped shirt.]
fourteen: (Default)

[personal profile] fourteen 2011-01-04 04:11 am (UTC)(link)
[ those words hit home, in a way that makes her bite off a gasp before he can hear it. "I'll be useless..."

very softly, sadly ]


You're not useless. Who would tell you something like that?

[identity profile] notablueskid.livejournal.com 2011-01-04 04:22 am (UTC)(link)
[He actually can't bring himself to sound bitter—Instead his voice is low and stoic.]

Everyone.

[He's a street rat. What else would they say? All he was was a stain on the sidewalk, to an otherwise ugly world where once you're down and out... hell, you're always down and out.]
fourteen: (Default)

[personal profile] fourteen 2011-01-04 04:44 am (UTC)(link)
You're not.

[ her voice is low too, though unlike his, it is charged with emotion. tense, tight, and a little desperate. ]

Don't you ever think something like that. No matter what anyone tells you. Of course you're worth something. You exist.

[ she thinks of Replica Riku, his tension and his anger...

she thinks of Luke, sweet and so sad, so guilty, like her. ]


You don't need to prove anything. Not to me.

[identity profile] not-a-blueskid.livejournal.com 2011-01-04 04:49 am (UTC)(link)
...I just wanna know why I'm here. If I was supposed t'be here... why did things go the way they did?

Was I ever supposed to be somethin' at all?
fourteen: (Default)

[personal profile] fourteen 2011-01-04 04:55 am (UTC)(link)
... supposed to be ... here? In Luceti?

[identity profile] not-a-blueskid.livejournal.com 2011-01-04 04:56 am (UTC)(link)
If I was... y'know



supposed to be alive.
fourteen: (Default)

[personal profile] fourteen 2011-01-04 05:03 am (UTC)(link)
[ there is a stunned silence. wolfwood, you're talking to the girl who has died twice and even now lives with the knowledge that if she ever leaves Luceti, she'll die, because she has to. she herself is not supposed to be alive. not at all.

how can she begin to know how to answer that? ]


... what ... I--

[ another pause. ]

... of course you are. There are people who care about you... I'm sure there are.

[identity profile] notablueskid.livejournal.com 2011-01-04 05:05 am (UTC)(link)
[He lowers his gaze, unsure.]

...Not back home, there isn't.

[If he died... who really would care? No one would even shed a tear over him.]
fourteen: (Default)

[personal profile] fourteen 2011-01-04 05:10 am (UTC)(link)
[ ... if only she knew more about him. but she doesn't. all she knows is... Vash. ]

But maybe there will be. In the future... you never know how things might turn out, right?

[ this is a little bizarre. a dead girl, trying to talk a hopeless kid into believing he has a chance at a future. something she herself will never have. strange. so strange. ]

[identity profile] notablueskid.livejournal.com 2011-01-04 05:13 am (UTC)(link)
[If only she knew he was just as dead as she is. How cruel and awful, things can be.]

Yeah... Well, that's why I'm gonna try to stay here. 'Cause now, I don't have to worry about livin' outside anymore. And I don't have to steal...

And I'm making friends here.

[That. That was interesting, making friends. And not just hunger buddies, but people who you could actually have real conversations with.]
fourteen: (Default)

[personal profile] fourteen 2011-01-04 05:38 am (UTC)(link)
[ it's probably best that she doesn't. that would only make this harder. what comfort can the dead give the dead? other than that, perhaps, they could be dead together? ]

... Luceti's good for things like that. It can be an awful place, but... I've made a lot of friends here too.

And besides... if you can make friends, doesn't that mean you're worth something? You must be, if they can care about you. [ that's what they taught her. Sanji. Riku. Sokka. Naoki. Fenimore. I'm worth caring about -- I must be here for a reason. ]

[identity profile] not-a-blueskid.livejournal.com 2011-01-04 05:42 am (UTC)(link)
[He huffs a breath.]

Can't be no worse than home.

Besides, y'don't gotta worry about going hungry here. That's something worth staying forever for.
fourteen: (Default)

[personal profile] fourteen 2011-01-05 12:49 am (UTC)(link)
... Nicholas? Just ... I know it's not that easy, but try, okay? Don't let anyone ever tell you you're useless, or worthless. It's not true.

[identity profile] not-a-blueskid.livejournal.com 2011-01-05 12:57 am (UTC)(link)
...



I think... if he's right... I'll be somethin' useful. When I'm older.
fourteen: (Default)

[personal profile] fourteen 2011-01-05 01:11 am (UTC)(link)
[ ... so there was someone. not just "everyone" ... "he."

Xion wonders who she is, and how hard it might be to kick his butt. ]


... whether that's true or not, you're worth something right now, okay? You don't ... [ a deep breath ] You don't have to be useful by some guy's definition to be important.

[identity profile] not-a-blueskid.livejournal.com 2011-01-05 01:18 am (UTC)(link)
I... I guess that's true.

[It is, right? It is true, isn't it?

He closes his eyes, and tries the taste of that sentence—]

I'm worth somethin' right now...?

[It goes against everything he's been told in life, and despite himself saying it before, he never really believed it. It was hard to do. But now, with so many people telling him otherwise...

He isn't sure what to think.]